We are at a place in our society that if there is ever a lag or pause in conversation most people immediately jump on their phone and start entertaining themselves. This happens in marriages and families, social functions or out with friends. Instead of letting the conversation die so we can feed our Facebook obsessions, let’s actually put some effort into getting to know the people around us.
Some might try to claim “We have known each other so long there is nothing new to talk about”. This is complete BS and let me tell you why.
1. People are extremely unique and complex creatures. Seeing the surface of who they are is only the beginning. There is always another layer to explore.
2. We are all constantly changing. Everyday new experiences and influences impact our life and effect what we think, what we believe and our perspective on situations or the world around us. You can never know all there is to know about a person because that person is not the same today as they were yesterday.
3. Finally, there are more hypothetical “what if” scenarios to theorize about than any one person can possibly cover in a life time.
My husband and I are never at a loss for interesting conversation. That is not to say we don’t put work into it. Sometimes the conversation just flows from topic to topic seamlessly as our thoughts and discussion morph the original idea down fascinating rabbit trails. Other times a topic ends and a new topic must be conjured up and put out there consciously. I feel you can learn a lot about a person through discussion of hypothetical scenarios. You might discover dreams or interests you didn’t know they had or personality traits even they didn’t know they had. The possibilities are endless! Any random thought can become lively conversation. If you have a hard time creating a topic off the top of your head you can start out simple, asking “what would you do if you won the lottery and why” can lead to hours of fun dialog. Anything and everything can become a “what if” topic and you never know what other subjects one random question might lead to. You also never know what might come of it, I recently asked my husband “if you had a TV show what would it be about?” he thought about it for a minute and then started rattling off the idea that popped in his head. Now, a week later, he has a team of people he is working with to actually make his brilliant idea a reality. All because I sparked a conversation with a random question.
I have come to find the more random the topic the more fascinating and entertaining the conversation, but you have to be willing to be open with it. If either person becomes self-conscious or feels judged it can lead to a fight rather than the fun it was intended for. As with any deeper than the surface conversation trust, respect and kindness are key.
So put the phone, tablet or computer down and go start a conversation that will lead to great memories and a deeper connection to those around you!